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Act 1, Scene 5

Court before the Duke of Albany's Palace.

  1. [Enter Lear, Kent, and Fool.]
  2. King Lear
  3. 848 Go you before to Gloster with these letters: acquaint my
  4. 849 daughter no further with anything you know than comes from her
  5. 850 demand out of the letter. If your diligence be not speedy, I
  6. 851 shall be there afore you.
  7. Kent
  8. 852 I will not sleep, my lord, till I have delivered your letter.
  9. [Exit.]
  10. Fool
  11. 853 If a man's brains were in's heels, were't not in danger of kibes?
  12. King Lear
  13. 854 Ay, boy.
  14. Fool
  15. 855 Then I pr'ythee be merry; thy wit shall not go slipshod.
  16. King Lear
  17. 856 Ha, ha, ha!
  18. Fool
  19. 857 Shalt see thy other daughter will use thee kindly; for though
  20. 858 she's as like this as a crab's like an apple, yet I can tell
  21. 859 what I can tell.
  22. King Lear
  23. 860 What canst tell, boy?
  24. Fool
  25. 861 She'll taste as like this as a crab does to a crab. Thou
  26. 862 canst tell why one's nose stands i' the middle on's face?
  27. King Lear
  28. 863 No.
  29. Fool
  30. 864 Why, to keep one's eyes of either side's nose, that what a man
  31. 865 cannot smell out, he may spy into.
  32. King Lear
  33. 866 I did her wrong,—
  34. Fool
  35. 867 Canst tell how an oyster makes his shell?
  36. King Lear
  37. 868 No.
  38. Fool
  39. 869 Nor I neither; but I can tell why a snail has a house.
  40. King Lear
  41. 870 Why?
  42. Fool
  43. 871 Why, to put's head in; not to give it away to his daughters, and
  44. 872 leave his horns without a case.
  45. King Lear
  46. 873 I will forget my nature. So kind a father!—Be my horses ready?
  47. Fool
  48. 874 Thy asses are gone about 'em. The reason why the seven stars are
  49. 875 no more than seven is a pretty reason.
  50. King Lear
  51. 876 Because they are not eight?
  52. Fool
  53. 877 Yes indeed: thou wouldst make a good fool.
  54. King Lear
  55. 878 To tak't again perforce!—Monster ingratitude!
  56. Fool
  57. 879 If thou wert my fool, nuncle, I'ld have thee beaten for being
  58. 880 old before thy time.
  59. King Lear
  60. 881 How's that?
  61. Fool
  62. 882 Thou shouldst not have been old till thou hadst been wise.
  63. King Lear
  64. 883 O, let me not be mad, not mad, sweet heaven!
  65. 884 Keep me in temper; I would not be mad!—
  66. [Enter Gentleman.]
  67. King Lear
  68. 885 How now? are the horses ready?
  69. Gentleman
  70. 886 Ready, my lord.
  71. King Lear
  72. 887 Come, boy.
  73. Fool
  74. 888 She that's a maid now, and laughs at my departure,
  75. 889 Shall not be a maid long, unless things be cut shorter.
  76. [Exeunt.]