Act 5, Scene 4

Another part of the Forest.

[Enter DUKE Senior, AMIENS, JAQUES, ORLANDO, OLIVER, and CELIA.]
Duke Senior
2309 Dost thou believe, Orlando, that the boy
2310 Can do all this that he hath promised?
Orlando
2311 I sometimes do believe and sometimes do not:
2312 As those that fear they hope, and know they fear.
[Enter ROSALIND, SILVIUS, and PHEBE.]
Rosalind
2313 Patience once more, whiles our compact is urg'd:—
[To the Duke.]
Rosalind
2314 You say, if I bring in your Rosalind,
2315 You will bestow her on Orlando here?
Duke Senior
2316 That would I, had I kingdoms to give with her.
[To Orlando.]
Rosalind
2317 And you say you will have her when I bring her?
Orlando
2318 That would I, were I of all kingdoms king.
[To Phebe.]
Rosalind
2319 You say you'll marry me, if I be willing?
Phebe
2320 That will I, should I die the hour after.
Rosalind
2321 But if you do refuse to marry me,
2322 You'll give yourself to this most faithful shepherd?
Phebe
2323 So is the bargain.
[To Silvius.]
Rosalind
2324 You say that you'll have Phebe, if she will?
Silvius
2325 Though to have her and death were both one thing.
Rosalind
2326 I have promis'd to make all this matter even.
2327 Keep you your word, O duke, to give your daughter;—
2328 You yours, Orlando, to receive his daughter;—
2329 Keep your word, Phebe, that you'll marry me;
2330 Or else, refusing me, to wed this shepherd:—
2331 Keep your word, Silvius, that you'll marry her
2332 If she refuse me:—and from hence I go,
2333 To make these doubts all even.
[Exeunt ROSALIND and CELIA.]
Duke Senior
2334 I do remember in this shepherd-boy
2335 Some lively touches of my daughter's favour.
Orlando
2336 My lord, the first time that I ever saw him
2337 Methought he was a brother to your daughter:
2338 But, my good lord, this boy is forest-born,
2339 And hath been tutor'd in the rudiments
2340 Of many desperate studies by his uncle,
2341 Whom he reports to be a great magician,
2342 Obscured in the circle of this forest.
Jaques
2343 There is, sure, another flood toward, and these couples are
2344 coming to the ark. Here comes a pair of very strange beasts
2345 which in all tongues are called fools.
[Enter TOUCHSTONE and AUDREY.]
Touchstone
2346 Salutation and greeting to you all!
Jaques
2347 Good my lord, bid him welcome. This is the motley-minded
2348 gentleman that I have so often met in the forest: he hath
2349 been a courtier, he swears.
Touchstone
2350 If any man doubt that, let him put me to my purgation.
2351 I have trod a measure; I have flattered a lady; I have been
2352 politic with my friend, smooth with mine enemy; I have undone
2353 three tailors; I have had four quarrels, and like to have fought
2354 one.
Jaques
2355 And how was that ta'en up?
Touchstone
2356 Faith, we met, and found the quarrel was upon the seventh cause.
Jaques
2357 How seventh cause? Good my lord, like this fellow.
Duke Senior
2358 I like him very well.
Touchstone
2359 God 'ild you, sir; I desire you of the like. I press in
2360 here, sir, amongst the rest of the country copulatives, to swear
2361 and to forswear; according as marriage binds and blood breaks:—A
2362 poor virgin, sir, an ill-favoured thing, sir, but mine own; a
2363 poor humour of mine, sir, to take that that no man else will;
2364 rich honesty dwells like a miser, sir, in a poor-house; as your
2365 pearl in your foul oyster.
Duke Senior
2366 By my faith, he is very swift and sententious.
Touchstone
2367 According to the fool's bolt, sir, and such dulcet diseases.
Jaques
2368 But, for the seventh cause; how did you find the quarrel on
2369 the seventh cause?
Touchstone
2370 Upon a lie seven times removed;—bear your body more
2371 seeming, Audrey:—as thus, sir, I did dislike the cut of a
2372 certain courtier's beard; he sent me word, if I said his beard
2373 was not cut well, he was in the mind it was: this is called the
2374 Retort courteous. If I sent him word again it was not well cut,
2375 he would send me word he cut it to please himself: this is called
2376 the Quip modest. If again, it was not well cut, he disabled my
2377 judgment: this is called the Reply churlish. If again, it was not
2378 well cut, he would answer I spake not true: this is called the
2379 Reproof valiant. If again, it was not well cut, he would say I
2380 lie: this is called the Countercheck quarrelsome: and so, to the
2381 Lie circumstantial, and the Lie direct.
Jaques
2382 And how oft did you say his beard was not well cut?
Touchstone
2383 I durst go no further than the Lie circumstantial, nor
2384 he durst not give me the Lie direct; and so we measured
2385 swords and parted.
Jaques
2386 Can you nominate in order now the degrees of the lie?
Touchstone
2387 O, sir, we quarrel in print by the book, as you have
2388 books for good manners: I will name you the degrees. The first,
2389 the Retort courteous; the second, the Quip modest; the third, the
2390 Reply churlish; the fourth, the Reproof valiant; the fifth, the
2391 Countercheck quarrelsome; the sixth, the Lie with circumstance;
2392 the seventh, the Lie direct. All these you may avoid but the Lie
2393 Direct; and you may avoid that too with an 'If'. I knew when
2394 seven justices could not take up a quarrel; but when the parties
2395 were met themselves, one of them thought but of an 'If', as: 'If
2396 you said so, then I said so;' and they shook hands, and swore
2397 brothers. Your 'If' is the only peace-maker;—much virtue in
2398 'If.'
Jaques
2399 Is not this a rare fellow, my lord? he's as good at anything, and
2400 yet a fool.
Duke Senior
2401 He uses his folly like a stalking-horse, and under the
2402 presentation of that he shoots his wit.
[Enter HYMEN, leading ROSALIND in woman's clothes; and CELIA.]
[Still MUSIC.]
Hymen
2403 Then is there mirth in heaven,
2404 When earthly things made even
2405 Atone together.
2406 Good duke, receive thy daughter;
2407 Hymen from heaven brought her,
2408 Yea, brought her hither,
2409 That thou mightst join her hand with his,
2410 Whose heart within his bosom is.
[To DUKE SENIOR.]
Rosalind
2411 To you I give myself, for I am yours.
[To ORLANDO.]
Rosalind
2412 To you I give myself, for I am yours.
Duke Senior
2413 If there be truth in sight, you are my daughter.
Orlando
2414 If there be truth in sight, you are my Rosalind.
Phebe
2415 If sight and shape be true,
2416 Why then, my love, adieu!
[To DUKE SENIOR.]
Rosalind
2417 I'll have no father, if you be not he;—
[To ORLANDO.]
Rosalind
2418 I'll have no husband, if you be not he;—
[To PHEBE.]
Rosalind
2419 Nor ne'er wed woman, if you be not she.
Hymen
2420 Peace, ho! I bar confusion:
2421 'Tis I must make conclusion
2422 Of these most strange events:
2423 Here's eight that must take hands
2424 To join in Hymen's bands,
2425 If truth holds true contents.
[To ORLANDO and ROSALIND.]
Hymen
2426 You and you no cross shall part:
[To OLIVER and CELIA.]
Hymen
2427 You and you are heart in heart;
[To PHEBE.]
Hymen
2428 You to his love must accord,
2429 Or have a woman to your lord:—
[To TOUCHSTONE and AUDREY.]
Hymen
2430 You and you are sure together,
2431 As the winter to foul weather.
2432 Whiles a wedlock-hymn we sing,
2433 Feed yourselves with questioning,
2434 That reason wonder may diminish,
2435 How thus we met, and these things finish.
[SONG]
Hymen
2436 Wedding is great Juno's crown;
2437 O blessed bond of board and bed!
2438 'Tis Hymen peoples every town;
2439 High wedlock then be honoured;
2440 Honour, high honour, and renown,
2441 To Hymen, god of every town!
Duke Senior
2442 O my dear niece, welcome thou art to me!
2443 Even daughter, welcome in no less degree.
[To SILVIUS.]
Phebe
2444 I will not eat my word, now thou art mine;
2445 Thy faith my fancy to thee doth combine.
[Enter JAQUES DE BOIS.]
Jaques de Bois
2446 Let me have audience for a word or two;
2447 I am the second son of old Sir Rowland,
2448 That bring these tidings to this fair assembly:—
2449 Duke Frederick, hearing how that every day
2450 Men of great worth resorted to this forest,
2451 Address'd a mighty power; which were on foot,
2452 In his own conduct, purposely to take
2453 His brother here, and put him to the sword:
2454 And to the skirts of this wild wood he came;
2455 Where, meeting with an old religious man,
2456 After some question with him, was converted
2457 Both from his enterprise and from the world;
2458 His crown bequeathing to his banish'd brother,
2459 And all their lands restored to them again
2460 That were with him exil'd. This to be true
2461 I do engage my life.
Duke Senior
2462 Welcome, young man:
2463 Thou offer'st fairly to thy brother's wedding:
2464 To one, his lands withheld; and to the other,
2465 A land itself at large, a potent dukedom.
2466 First, in this forest, let us do those ends
2467 That here were well begun and well begot:
2468 And after, every of this happy number,
2469 That have endur'd shrewd days and nights with us,
2470 Shall share the good of our returned fortune,
2471 According to the measure of their states.
2472 Meantime, forget this new-fall'n dignity,
2473 And fall into our rustic revelry:—
2474 Play, music!—and you brides and bridegrooms all,
2475 With measure heap'd in joy, to the measures fall.
Jaques
2476 Sir, by your patience. If I heard you rightly,
2477 The duke hath put on a religious life,
2478 And thrown into neglect the pompous court?
Jaques de Bois
2479 He hath.
Jaques
2480 To him will I: out of these convertites
2481 There is much matter to be heard and learn'd.—
[To DUKE SENIOR]
Jaques
2482 You to your former honour I bequeath;
2483 Your patience and your virtue well deserves it:—
[To ORLANDO]
Jaques
2484 You to a love that your true faith doth merit:—
[To OLIVER]
Jaques
2485 You to your land, and love, and great allies:—
[To SILVIUS]
Jaques
2486 You to a long and well-deserved bed:—
[To TOUCHSTONE]
Jaques
2487 And you to wrangling; for thy loving voyage
2488 Is but for two months victuall'd.—So to your pleasures;
2489 I am for other than for dancing measures.
Duke Senior
2490 Stay, Jaques, stay.
Jaques
2491 To see no pastime I; what you would have
2492 I'll stay to know at your abandon'd cave.
[Exit.]
Duke Senior
2493 Proceed, proceed: we will begin these rites,
2494 As we do trust they'll end, in true delights.
[A dance.]
[EPILOGUE]
Rosalind
2495 It is not the fashion to see the lady the epilogue; but
2496 it is no more unhandsome than to see the lord the prologue.
2497 If it be true that good wine needs no bush, 'tis true that a good
2498 play needs no epilogue. Yet to good wine they do use good bushes;
2499 and good plays prove the better by the help of good epilogues.
2500 What a case am I in, then, that am neither a good epilogue nor
2501 cannot insinuate with you in the behalf of a good play! I am not
2502 furnished like a beggar; therefore to beg will not become me: my
2503 way is to conjure you; and I'll begin with the women. I charge
2504 you, O women, for the love you bear to men, to like as much of
2505 this play as please you: and I charge you, O men, for the love
2506 you bear to women;—as I perceive by your simpering, none of you
2507 hates them,—that between you and the women the play may please.
2508 If I were a woman, I would kiss as many of you as had beards that
2509 pleased me, complexions that liked me, and breaths that I defied
2510 not; and, I am sure, as many as have good beards, or good faces,
2511 or sweet breaths, will, for my kind offer, when I make curtsy,
2512 bid me farewell.
[Exeunt.]

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Word definitions on hover

Notes

TLN 2312syntax grammar
“As those that fear they hope, and know they fear”
Orlando means: he swings between belief and doubt the way people in a desperate situation both hope for rescue and know they may still be doomed. 'Fear they hope' = are afraid to trust their own hope; 'know they fear' = cannot shake the fear even when they believe. The chiasm (A/B reversed as B/A) enacts the oscillation.
TLN 2343biblical allusion
“another flood toward, and these couples are coming to the ark”
Jaques is riffing on Noah's ark: when a flood came, animals boarded two by two to be saved. He compares the arriving pairs of lovers to the animals boarding the ark, mocking their eagerness to couple up.
TLN 2347cultural context
“the motley-minded gentleman”
'Motley' was the patchwork, multi-coloured cloth worn by professional jesters or fools at court — their distinctive uniform and license to speak freely. Calling Touchstone 'motley-minded' means his mind works the way a fool's costume looks: mixed, incongruous, not committed to one color or view.
TLN 2350wordplay
“let him put me to my purgation”
'Purgation' meant both a medical purge (a laxative or blood-letting that cleared the body) and a legal/ecclesiastical process of clearing oneself of a charge by oath or trial. Touchstone invites any skeptic to 'purge' his credentials as a courtier — either put him through an examination or, in the bodily sense, give him a purge (a joke at his own expense).
TLN 2351cultural context
“I have trod a measure; I have flattered a lady; I have been politic with my friend, smooth with mine enemy; I have undone three tailors”
Touchstone is cataloguing the marks of a genuine courtier. 'Trod a measure' means danced a stately court dance. 'Been politic with my friend' means plotted shrewdly even with allies. 'Undone three tailors' means ran up unpaid bills — a mark of aristocratic extravagance and contempt for tradesmen.
TLN 2359archaic vocab
“God 'ild you, sir; I desire you of the like. I press in here, sir, amongst the rest of the country copulatives”
'God 'ild you' is a contraction of 'God yield you,' meaning 'God reward you' (a polite thank-you). 'Copulatives' is a mock-legal term for those joining in marriage — from Latin 'copula' (a bond or coupling). Touchstone calls the paired lovers 'country copulatives,' treating the wedding as a grammatical coupling (joining two subjects) while also punning on the sexual meaning.
TLN 2366archaic vocab
“very swift and sententious”
'Sententious' meant full of pithy, morally pointed sayings — packed with 'sentences' (maxims). Duke Senior is praising Touchstone for delivering witty moral aphorisms rapidly, a mark of court eloquence. Today 'sententious' usually implies pompous moralizing, but here it is a compliment.
TLN 2373cultural context
“the Retort courteous”
Touchstone parodies the elaborate dueling-culture of the Elizabethan and Jacobean gentry, which classified insults and their replies in formal grades. His seven 'degrees of the lie' — Retort Courteous, Quip Modest, Reply Churlish, Reproof Valiant, Countercheck Quarrelsome, Lie Circumstantial, Lie Direct — mock the courtesy-book tradition that tried to codify when a gentleman was honour-bound to fight and when he could let an insult pass without disgrace.
TLN 2397rhetorical device
“much virtue in 'If'”
Touchstone's punchline: the word 'If' is the most powerful peacemaker in language, because it converts any direct statement (which demands a response) into a hypothesis (which requires none). The Lie Direct — the most dangerous insult — becomes harmless the moment you phrase it as 'If you said so, then I said so.' Touchstone notes that this tiny word has saved more from duels than all the elaborate degrees of etiquette combined.
TLN 2401cultural context
“He uses his folly like a stalking-horse, and under the presentation of that he shoots his wit”
A stalking-horse was a real or artificial horse that a hunter hid behind while creeping up on game — the animal screened his approach. Duke Senior says Touchstone deploys his 'folly' (his fool's role) the same way: the apparent foolishness conceals the real shot, which is wit. The best fool-wit lands precisely because it was hidden inside apparent nonsense.
TLN 2407classical allusion
“Hymen from heaven brought her”
Hymen was the classical god of marriage, invoked at Greek and Roman weddings with the cry 'Io Hymen Hymenaee!' and pictured carrying a bridal torch. Bringing a figure representing Hymen on stage — with 'still music' — is a theatrical masque that resolves the play's disguise-plot: the god of marriage himself presents Rosalind and blesses the four couples at once.
classical Hymen, god of marriage
TLN 2436classical allusion
“Wedding is great Juno's crown”
Juno (Greek Hera) was the Roman queen of the gods and the special protector of marriage and women. To call wedding 'Juno's crown' is to identify the institution of marriage as her defining achievement and glory. The song elevates the four simultaneous weddings by linking them to the divine guarantor of matrimony herself.
classical Juno, queen of the gods
TLN 2451archaic vocab
“Address'd a mighty power; which were on foot, In his own conduct, purposely to take His brother here, and put him to the sword”
'Address'd a mighty power' means assembled and set in motion a large army. 'In his own conduct' means under his personal command. Jaques de Bois reports that Duke Frederick mobilized troops and led them himself, intending to kill his exiled brother Duke Senior.
TLN 2480archaic vocab
“out of these convertites There is much matter to be heard and learn'd”
'Convertites' are converts — people newly changed in their religious belief or way of life. Jaques means Duke Frederick, who has just converted from worldly ambition to a religious life. The word also glances at Oliver, changed by Orlando's rescue from him. Jaques, the play's perpetual outsider, sees in these sudden conversions material worth studying.
historical Melancholy and the malcontent
TLN 2487wordplay
“thy loving voyage Is but for two months victuall'd”
Jaques predicts Touchstone's marriage will dissolve within two months, comparing it to a sea voyage that has taken on only two months' worth of food ('victualled'). When the supplies run out — when the initial desire is satisfied — the voyage (the marriage) will be over. 'Victualled' means provisioned with food.
TLN 2497cultural context
“good wine needs no bush”
This is a well-known Elizabethan proverb: taverns hung a bush (a bundle of ivy or vine leaves) over their doors as a sign, advertising wine for sale. If the wine was genuinely good, the bush was unnecessary — quality sold itself. Rosalind applies it to the play: a truly good play needs no epilogue to sell it to the audience.
TLN 2502wordplay
“my way is to conjure you”
'Conjure' meant both to appeal or entreat solemnly (its ordinary sense here: 'I solemnly charge you') and to use magic spells. Rosalind's epilogue is a playful incantation: she will cast a spell on the women to like the play and on the men to like it in return. The magical frame suits a comedy that has just staged a wedding masque and a goddess.
TLN 2508cultural context
“If I were a woman, I would kiss as many of you as had beards that pleased me”
On Shakespeare's stage, all female roles were played by male actors, usually boys or young men. 'If I were a woman' is therefore both a character's joke (Rosalind, now revealed as a woman, pretends she is not) and the actor's acknowledgment that he is in fact a male performer: the line steps out of the fiction and winks at the theatrical convention.
classical Ganymede, cupbearer of Jove